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WARNING TRANSIENTS: Keep Out Or LL Cool J Will Kick Your A$$

LLCOOL 

We are living in some scary times these days. Lately, home burglaries and car thefts have been rampant all over Los Angeles. Well, listen up criminal hobos, vagrants and vagabonds alike… take one step into our homes, make one crack in our car window and LL Cool J will give you a nose job! We’ll push your sorry a$$es down!

Want proof? When transient, Jonathan Kirby, 56, attempted to burglarize LL Cool J‘s home at 1 a.m. on Wednesday, little did Kirby know he wasn’t leaving with anything expensive and shiny… just a shiner on his face; suffering from a broken nose and jaw.

Let this be a warning to you. Don’t steal our $hi%, get a job and buy your own.

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